To fly

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To fly

Raluca Blănaru

Publicat Duminică, 8 Aprilie 2007, ora 17:47

      A weird feeling is coming up to me…I feel like if I get up the chair that is supporting me now, I could fly, I could raise up easily to the sky. I feel something that cannot be dammed up, a new and lasting feeling.
      I look around me, now I wish that the meeting where I am, to finish for my trying the possible miraculous powers I may carry on.
      I`m thinking if the others are feeling the same skycalling, I mean the desire to be like the divine birds of the high and misterious infinit.
      I look at the clock on the wall and I`m waiting for the second hand to come closer to 12 because I know that the minutes are going by and my wild feelig has one minute minus left to wait until it is entrusted the freedom to grow to him.
      The clock on the wall became now my primordial preoccupation, and its ticking is ringing in my mind as it would represent my single way out to the liberation from the imaginary limits of the conduct … because it is holding me down from getting up and try my weird feeling.
      I hear vague wispers that are passing over my ear like warm vibrations, but at the same time they are disturbing, because they are baffling me from my usual look at the dial of the clock, my target from now on. The only thing I can do is to return to what I call “normality” and to count the second left until the passing of the time.
      I am hypnotized by the circular and ordinary motion of the second hand and because of that I feel that outbreak of tha desire to fly again. A deep, hot and strong breeze it’s trying me now…it makes me be able to do things that I might regret later and consider them irremediably outbursts, but unacceptable too for a person like me…a person who always asks something better from her… I must rezist and not infringe the rules which are forming my precious and necessary education…so, I must hold myself on this chair for not to be sorry later that I wasn’t pacient enough with me and with my own feelings. What will hapend then? I’ll get many reproach and I will hear only words that I wiil want to hide of, to try not to understand them, to seem foreigner to me because not to feel thier real meaning.
      Maybe there is no raising feeling in me, maybe the desire of doing that is making me fals senzations…or maybe I’m wrong and it’s possible that I’m not the only one who feels this way and maybe everybody in this room has the same wish: to get this meeting over for the trying of the virtual or real great powers.
      I’m staying with this questions in my mind three hours from now on because the gentlemen in front me are preparing serious speaches which have as a “exciting” subject any other one but the desire to fly…

© Copyright Raluca Blănaru
Sursa :   Imagikon

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